Thursday, August 5, 2010

A perfect answer to a long awaited question...

I am not usually the kind of blogger that gets all preachy and heart-filled, but I came across this and I just think Carolyn's answer is perfect. I have often been asked the same question and never quite know what to say. This was written to Carolyn, a Q&A writer for "The Washington Post".


Carolyn:
Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc. Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today? Her: Park, play group . . .
Okay. I've done Internet searches, I've talked to parents. I don't get it. What do stay-at-home moms do all day? Please no lists of library, grocery store, dry cleaners . . . I do all those things, too, and I don't do them EVERY DAY. I guess what I'm asking is: What is a typical day and why don't moms have time for a call or e-mail? I work and am away from home nine hours a day (plus a few late work events) and I manage to get it all done. I'm feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy -- not a bad thing at all -- but if so, why won't my friend tell me the truth? Is this a peeing contest ("My life is so much harder than yours")? What's the deal? I've got friends with and without kids and all us child-free folks get the same story and have the same questions.
Tacoma, Wash.


Relax and enjoy. You're funny.
Or you're lying about having friends with kids.
Or you're taking them at their word that they actually have kids, because you haven't personally been in the same room with them.
Internet searches?
I keep wavering between giving you a straight answer and giving my forehead some keyboard. To claim you want to understand, while in the same breath implying that the only logical conclusions are that your mom-friends are either lying or competing with you, is disingenuous indeed.
So, since it's validation you seem to want, the real answer is what you get. In list form. When you have young kids, your typical day is: constant attention, from getting them out of bed, fed, clean, dressed; to keeping them out of harm's way; to answering their coos, cries, questions; to having two arms and carrying one kid, one set of car keys, and supplies for even the quickest trips, including the latest-to-be-declared-essential piece of molded plastic gear; to keeping them from unshelving books at the library; to enforcing rest times; to staying one step ahead of them lest they get too hungry, tired or bored, any one of which produces the kind of checkout-line screaming that gets the checkout line shaking its head.
It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15.
It's constant vigilance, constant touch, constant use of your voice, constant relegation of your needs to the second tier.
It's constant scrutiny and second-guessing from family and friends, well-meaning and otherwise. It's resisting constant temptation to seek short-term relief at everyone's long-term expense.
It's doing all this while concurrently teaching virtually everything -- language, manners, safety, resourcefulness, discipline, curiosity, creativity. Empathy. Everything.
It's also a choice, yes. And a joy. But if you spent all day, every day, with this brand of joy, and then, when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Brandon's Graduation Party!

Brandon is Graduating from UVU this week. I had a surprise party for him last night at Classic Skating. It was 80's themed. He was actually surprised, I thought for sure someone had leaked it to him. Thanks everyone for coming and all your help. It was so much FUN!

Brandon's surprised face!
Brandon's sweet outfit.



Here are a few more pic's of some of the awesome 80's outfit's.
We had many other family and friends come, so sorry all of your pic's are not up
.





Sweden




My lifelong friend, Julie was kind enough to get married in Sweden, so I had an excuse to go! My Friend Hillary and I went to Sweden last week for 1 week. We were able to do some great sightseeing, relaxing, and just visiting with Julie and her family. I had so much fun and I am really grateful for everyone who took care of Logan while I was gone. I really missed Brandon and Logan, but I am also glad I did not have to deal with a baby adjusting to a 8 hour time change. Julie was one of the most perfect looking brides, and it had nothing to do with me doing her hair and make-up. Her husband Johan is amazing and I am so happy for her! Thanks Julie for having us!


Hillary and I had a layover in Paris, so we did a little sightseeing.

This is in Stockholm, I loved the new and old look of this building!

This is a church I thought was really pretty in Upsalla.
This was inside the church in Upsalla.
This was on the beach, which was just a few blocks away from the summer home of Johan's family's, where we stayed.
Julie and Johan
The up-do I did for Julie's wedding.
Me, Julie, and Hillary outside of the church after the wedding.

This is in Stockholm.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

I am not the best blogger...

Our new Home. (this was taken by the previous owners)
Sorry to my family and friends who actually look at this, and especially to the people who do not live in Utah, and depend on my posts for updates! Here is a a brief summary of the past few months. We bought and moved into a house in Springville last December. Logan is a typical (almost) 2 year old. He is sweet, funny, helpful, stubborn, and very energetic! He is quite the chatter box and will break in to dance spontaneously whenever he hears music. Brandon is graduating with his Bachelors in Business/Marketing this week from UVU. I still do hair part time (and always taking new clients if you know anyone, hint hint.) I am temporarily working at Zales very part time to fund a trip to Sweden, that my friend Hillary and went to last week. I am excited for life to calm down a bit with Brandon graduating.
The end of February I drank some radioactive iodine to kill my thyroid, it was to treat Grave's disease which I was diagnosed in January. I am doing pretty well, just be tested on medicine. Once the doctors get the medicine levels right I should feel close to normal. After I drank the iodine, I stayed in a hotel by myself for 4 days. It was pretty relaxing. I was able to read "The Hunger Games" and "Catching Fire" which I would recommend to anyone. And also watched the first 2 seasons of "Mad Men" which I am completely addicted to!
That about sums it up, I will try to do better!